yesterday i caught my hair int he mirror and it had grown out and gotten just crazy enough to get to 'cool but crazed mad scientist' or even '80's movie bad cool guys friend'

can't wait to get back to full on '80's rich kid villain' again

Luxotek :sulfur: boosted

It's 2021, no ones actually seen an Amazon delivery employee alive in almost 2 years, only the sound of them running full speed at our doors, two quick knocks, and then immediately the sound of them running away at full speed again.
1 in 5 deliveries are accompanied with a human shit two feet from the package as the knock is the only time the employee isn't traveling at a full run for their entire 22 hour shift.
1 in 35 deliveries are accompanied by a corpse and then 3 minutes later an employee disposal drone.
Amazon is currently considered the most humane employer in North America and responsible for 258 million employees and 118 million occupied maturation chambers containing Amazon brand fetuses with a maximum of 125 million still developing new Amazon workers made from copyrighted Amazon DNA sequences.

jeebus.. pains off the charts today
was hoping to be productive since i finally got some sleep after 3-4 days but noooooo....
at least the stuff i won on giveaways the other day is arriving and i'm getting the little bit of dopamine from opening new stuff and playing with it a bit
the new season of jessica jones has been a nice distraction too but it feels more and more like all i ever do is watch tv so now that's just adding more guilt to being disabled/ill
ugh

ok thats admittedly darker than intended

It's 2021, no ones actually seen an Amazon delivery employee alive in almost 2 years, only the sound of them running full speed at our doors, two quick knocks, and then immediately the sound of them running away at full speed again.
1 in 5 deliveries are accompanied with a human shit two feet from the package as the knock is the only time the employee isn't traveling at a full run for their entire 22 hour shift.
1 in 35 deliveries are accompanied by a corpse and then 3 minutes later an employee disposal drone.
Amazon is currently considered the most humane employer in North America and responsible for 258 million employees and 118 million occupied maturation chambers containing Amazon brand fetuses with a maximum of 125 million still developing new Amazon workers made from copyrighted Amazon DNA sequences.

Luxotek :sulfur: boosted

sometimes you just gotta bite your tongue till you can find an assassin who's willing to take a Discover card

shout out to all the new followers that haven't figured out to mute me yet..
suckers

Luxotek :sulfur: boosted

aww poor little boomers all angsty today cause he's too repressed to even dare think about getting something for the yeast infection on his poor tiny little itchy balls

post thru the burn little man.. post thru it

someone set me on fire and drop kick me into a jet engine

Luxotek :sulfur: boosted

I feel like I know about 10% of what’s going on at any given time and I’m not sure if that’s a blessing or a curse

aww poor little boomers all angsty today cause he's too repressed to even dare think about getting something for the yeast infection on his poor tiny little itchy balls

post thru the burn little man.. post thru it

Luxotek :sulfur: boosted
Luxotek :sulfur: boosted

Just traded in my Mastodon clout for four soft tacos and a Mountain Dew at Taco Bell

Luxotek :sulfur: boosted
Luxotek :sulfur: boosted
Luxotek :sulfur: boosted

@anna i see. So this is where you get your immense power.

Luxotek :sulfur: boosted

@anna hmmm wow you just going to point out something obvious, that a child could have realized, but that I, an adult, didn’t think of?? Wow. Ok. Wow, I guess that’s how things are around here huh. Wow. Just wow.

gonna take 4 hours to watch a 1 hour episode cause i'm having such a hard time following anything anyone is saying
like just thinking about something for a second or glancing at the TL and i'm lost on what's going on

whats worse is the pains coming back in a massive way but i'm still uncomfortably high from the pain meds getting weird 2 hours ago so its like - do i take some of the other ones and likely just end up throwing them up or just suffer.. like hows this gonna work for the rest of the night now

weeeeee!!

Luxotek :sulfur: boosted
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Dystopian.Fun

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